No, NoWriMo :(

"No novel for you!"

“No novel for you!”

No. No, I didn’t finish NaNoWriMo. I terrible failure.

Didn’t even hit the 20k mark. “Life”, is the best excuse I can come up with. “Responsibiliblah”. Nothing insurmountable.

I’ve hit the 50k for two prior NaNo’s, and have told myself each time that the main thing was getting in the practice of writing every day. Except! It never formed a longer habit. November would leave me frazzled, I’d tap out till after Christmas. And I never went back for a proper review of the work that I had done.

The mania of it, the desperate grasping hurtle towards an ever greater word count, left an unbearable impression of awfulness. The ideas died, suffocated under a weight of low grade logorrhea.

So I didn’t finish this year, but I didn’t kill the idea either. I *do* still need to do work, a lot more work, in fact it repeatedly ocurred to me during November how much more work than I thought I had to do I actually had to do, and that realisation would dawn on me on each of the days that I did do write, and NOW you get a flavour of how I write during NNWM.

I checked the NaNo site again today, the first time since Nov 30 lapsed without fanfare, and – lo and behold – I do get a jpeg anyway. A participant’s medal. It hadn’t occurred to me that they would do that, but of course they would do that.

What’s that though? Follow the link and – of course they would do that – NNWM has Goal Trackers, advice, and forums for the What Now? months.

Perversely, I’m touched by this. I don’t know if I thought NNWM, the site, and all its contributors turned into assorted squashes come Dec 1, but that might as well have been the case.

That little discovery was a tiny unexpected jolt of encouragement to continue.

 

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